For the first fifteen years of our relationship, my husband and I both lived in 1,200 square feet or smaller spaces. As someone who hates clutter, I didn’t own a bunch of stuff, especially furniture. When we purchased our 1,800 square foot house this past winter, it felt like moving into a mansion. For the first time, we had space for three bedrooms. While the potential to have friends and their kids come (comfortably) stay with us for long stretches of time excited me, it also meant we needed to go furniture shopping. This process took weeks and over ten trips to different furniture stores, turning into quite the dilemma that wasn’t just about the furniture. We finally found not one by two bedroom sets we liked, and the decision between them forced enough internal dialogue that it felt worth sharing. Below, I cover the tale of the two bedroom sets and how we chose between them with the hope that it will help you walk through decisions on large purchases, too.
The dilemma when making large purchases
It started with more than two bedroom sets. I found several I would have enjoyed having in our guest room in the four months we spent looking, but we ruled out most of them right away because of cost. As a couple that hopes to reach financial independence in the next five or so years, we are always mindful of where we spend our money. We set a furniture and home improvement budget when we bought the house, and by the time we got around to purchasing a bedroom set, we had a little under $8,000 left. While that would have bought every bedroom set we looked at that I liked, that $8,000 also needed to pay for:
- Fixing the grading under the pavers in the back patio area
- Buying a conversation set for our back deck for entertaining
- Replacing three old windows in the kitchen and bathrooms
- Upgrading the kitchen sink
Some of the bedroom sets we looked at that I swooned over were handcrafted wood and were absolutely stunning. The price tag, however, was a nightmare, with many over $4,000. Some of the bedframes alone were $4,000 before you addressed a dresser or nightstands.
We could have budgeted and saved to buy one of these sets, and it is something I considered during our search, which we’ll cover below. But my gut reaction was, as beautiful as they were, I didn’t value any bedroom set enough to spend our entire budget, or most of our budget, on it thus forcing us to delay our other goals.
My spidey senses told me this was too much, which helped us determine limits for ourselves. And off to the next furniture store we went. When it would stop, nobody knew. (My husband hoped soon, though, as he really wanted to spend his free time on weekends playing Metal Gear Solid and Doom: The Dark Ages instead of wandering through warehouses.)
This wasn’t us being cheap, but understanding our values as frugal people. We valued a nice-looking bedroom set, but didn’t value buying the top of the line nicest option, especially since it wasn’t even for our bedroom. (No offense to our friends, but I doubt they care much either.)
The tale of the two bedroom sets
We drove into Boulder, CO to hit up REI for their annual anniversary sale (I love me a good sale and had dividends, AKA coupons, to spend). On the way home, I asked if we could “swing by” the Furniture Row in Dacono, CO. This was after making a pit stop at the HomeGoods in Boulder. Furniture Row wasn’t anywhere near the direction of our house, until you count it also being slightly north of Boulder as “adjacent.” My husband gave me that tired, resigned sideways glance and said we could go if I thought we’d find something there. It was hard to blame him for his reluctance at this point since I’d already dragged him along to several stores in multiple towns weekend after weekend. And I felt bad because I couldn’t promise we’d find something, and history suggested the odds weren’t ever in our favor, but I was optimistic because I’d checked the website and had seen some potential sets that looked nice. So heigh-ho, heigh-ho, off to the furniture store we go.
We wandered the aisles of bedframes and dressers aimlessly, following the flow of wooden sets, ignoring the “in style” distressed wood we already have for our bedroom that’s starting to feel aged and instead focused on more timeless, classical styles. We were on a quest for the Goldilocks set: not to light, not to dark, but just right in a walnut or similar style. I meandered over to the Amish section of natural woods, which I always default to as timeless, but the price tag was a similar story to the situations we’d run into above, so we turned right around and stumbled into the Wolf Creek set I’d found online as a potential.
I dragged my husband over and asked what he thought. He liked it, and I breathed in a deep, satisfied breath. We’d found one, we’d agreed, and they were running a special promo for the weekend so it was on sale. Win-win-win. I snapped a picture of the dimensions so we could go home and measure out the space to determine which dresser and nightstand combination we could fit given that there were several pieces in the set.
My husband turned, ready to get home after a long morning of chores, but I continued to browse, wanting to make sure we’d found the right set. Sure enough, halfway down the next aisle, he called me over this time for another set he liked.
Having looked at the pricing sheet for the Wolf Creek set and more than likely done the back-of-the-envelope math on what we were looking at for the guest room, the Mateo set offered in an enticing smaller price point, which undoubtedly was the big draw for my husband.
Willing to humor him, I assessed the set, pulling open the drawers of the nightstand and commenting on the MFD material versus the more natural wood of the Wolf Creek set. I’d already decided in my mind I liked the Wolf Creek, and a tiny blemish in the veneer on the edge of the showroom dresser seemed to solidify it in my head: I wanted to spend more to have the nicer stuff.
And then the little voice inside my head whispered one of the most important questions when it comes to making decisions on big purchases: Why?
God dammit, I really hate that voice sometimes, especially since it tends to be right.
Why did I want the slightly fancier but significantly more expensive bedroom set?
Because it looked nicer!
Fair. But then she chimed in again: why do you care?
Because… because…. uhhhh… I stood rooted in front of the set on display and couldn’t come up with a good answer. “I want something that will last” was the best I could come up with. Having lived with MFD and veneer furniture for the past fifteen years, I knew that even though it might not have the “nicest” finish didn’t mean it wouldn’t hold up over time. And if the bedroom set was primarily for guests, how often were we really going to use it?
So I snapped a picture of the dimensions and pricing for the Mateo set and got a quote from the store manager before we left. When he ran the numbers, I realized we could get the entire four-piece Mateo set for cheaper than just the bedframe of the Wolf Creek. That stuck in my head the entire drive home.
Always sleep on the decision before making a big purchase
Note here that we left the store without making a final decision. Whenever we’re spending a few hundred dollars or more (what we consider a big purchase in our household), we like to think it over to make sure we’re making a logical, well thought out decision versus an impulse buy that we’ll later regret. This works for smaller purchases too, especially if you’re trying to curb your Amazon addiction.
That evening, I kept coming back to my rationale for not upping our budget for an even nicer set. We could afford it, but that didn’t mean we wanted to spend that much on furniture. Why? Because every purchase is a balance of opportunity costs. The more we spent on furniture, the less we could spend on other things. The real question was: what did I value more? Did I want to debate our decision over dinner that night with my husband to persuade him to come to the dark side of the Wolf Creek set, or did I want to take the difference we’d save with the Mateo and prioritize it for something else?
I’m not just talking new windows or patio furniture here, either. One of my goals for that afternoon was to put together our plans for a long weekend trip to Telluride. If you, like me, haven’t been to Telluride, it’s a beautiful little town nestled in the mountains. It’s so incredible, it inspires songs.
I’ve been wanting to go for years, but it’s expensive so we haven’t prioritized it.
Which choice we made
In the end, it wasn’t just about the bedroom set. It was about the bedroom set AND what we did with the remaining money.
This furniture decision, for me, didn’t just come down to the Wolf Creek versus the Mateo. It became Wolf Creek versus Telluride, a decision of values and priorities. And when I thought of it that way, the real wood versus veneer wasn’t as important because we value trips and experiences over the quality of furniture in our house.
Instead of trying to convince my husband to change his mind, I joined the Mateo fan club. I went to bed convinced the Mateo was the better option for us, and woke up still thinking it was the best fit. So we bought the Mateo set and then booked a four-day trip to Salida, Ouray, and Telluride to explore the mountains and go hiking. #NoRegrets
Measure twice, cut once
One final key piece of the puzzle was figuring out which pieces of the bedroom set to buy. I’m partial to a four-piece set that included a bedframe, a dresser, and two nightstands. I like the symmetry it can provide, and gives both people space to house their books and stash away their phones at the end of the night. So we planned on buying these four pieces in the matching set.
When we got home, we busted out the trusty tape measure and pulled up the photo of dimensions I took. While we could make the bed + two nightstands fit, it would be tight with our guestroom layout. Really tight. So we decided to lose the second nightstand, which would not only make the room more comfortable for guests but would free up a little additional cash as well for other home projects or toward our Telluride trip.
With home projects, we learned the phrase: measure twice, cut once. I can often mismeasure something twice, so I like to measure thrice, cut once to double check my double check. Before making big purchases, I like to triple check it will not only fit but will be a good match for the space and our wants. Otherwise, even the most well thought out purchase can still end up being a waste of money if it doesn’t work practically. And who needs the hassle of trying to navigate unnecessary returns? Not me.
The final word
We’re all about being frugal. This doesn’t mean we never spend money, but that we do our best to spend intentionally on what matters most to us. Since we don’t put a lot of value into furniture, it wasn’t worth the additional cost to buy a nicer bedroom set. Instead, we decided to buy the value furniture so we’d have more money to spend on what we did value. Your values don’t have to align with ours, so you could very well end up making a different decision than we did. There’s no right answer, only the right answer for you.